Don't Tread on Me

I am in college.  I go to the gym daily(ish). 

Now, in the beginning of the year everybody knows that the gym is going to be overly crowded.  It is full of people trying to keep New Year's resolutions that they have made, promising themselves that by the time summer rolls around they are going to look good in a bathing suit. 

Something else everybody knows: Most college kids have little to no will power.  This is not a slight at group of people, just a fact of life. [You take the good  you take the bad you take them both and there you have The Facts of Life!]

Now, I go to Penn State, and we have this little thing known as THON (Google that for yourself if you don't know about it) - and this is another motivation for students to go to the gym. 

Long story short- both THON and the beginning of the year are done, so the gym is much less crowded, making it much easier to observe people. 

I have discovered just a few things about people that go to the gym that really does not sit well with me

The first of these things would be texting while sitting on a machine.  I especially dislike this when they are on a machine that I want to use. 

I mean, REALLY?  You really need your phone while in the gym?  FURTHER- you need to occupy the space where I want to be while you text? Stand in a corner and text.  OH WAIT.  MAYBE it would be a good idea to leave your phone in your locker.  But that's just me. 


Aside from the texters there is another group of people that kill me at the gym:  The people who stare at other people.  Now- let's get things straight- I observe other people- but I do it properly.  I glance at people every now and then just to see what is up.  It is not OK to stare at someone the entire time that they are doing crunches- trust me, they do not want you to stare at them.

There are only two reasons that people would want you to look at them while at the gym. One reason would be if there is a mutual attraction between the two parties, and there is casual glancing from one person to the next.  This reason is perfectly acceptable, if used in the right quantities. 

Which leads me to the next set of people that bother me at the gym.  The people who cleary DO want you to stare at them the entire time they are working out.  "Look at me! Look at me! I can bench press 500 pounds! Me tough guy! Me so tough!"  We get it.  You're in better shape than us.  You probably have a small penis though, so I'm not all that jealous.

Now for the last type of person that I discovered today while at the gym: the person who sings to himself the whole time.  This person need not be wearing headphones- he can just as easily sing along to the music playing over the speaker.  The worst is when they get really really into it.  It is as if they are singing in the privacy of their own shower.  Guess what?  They gym is a public place.   People can see you.  Much more- they can see you.

Oh yeah.  I am definitely guilty of being that lip-synching gym star.  Whatever, I'm cool with it.